JJ and Hotch - Plain and Simple love
by Emmie D
Summary: After a late night at the office, JJ has been taken hostage. Hotch must figure out the connections between JJ and her abducter in order to save her. A hint towards JJ/Hotch romance (drama, romance, hurt/comfort) English isn't my first language, sorry for any errors in the story. Hope you like it


It was late.. way too late for JJ to be at the BAU. She didn't dare to look at the clock. '_This will definitely lead to an argument'_ she thought while running her hands through her face. Lately there were many tensions in her relationship with Will.Most of them had to do with her work. She knew it wasn't easy for Will, but he had to understand that it wasn't easy for her as well. The thought of another upcoming fight already gave her a headache.

She was working out a report for the case they worked on. Normally Hotch did that, but since she was the one who'd conducted the interviews she wanted to write the report herself. For the sake of her concentration she needed a quiet place and since she had no office of her own anymore she gave Rossi her sweetest smile while asking if she could sit in his office. As she expected that wasn't a problem.

JJ scared from the knock on her door.  
"JJ, don't you need any sleep or something?" Garcia stood in the doorway.  
"Nope, these days I'm living on coffee" she said with a wink.  
"Aah you poor thing!" Garcia said, her tone became more serious "you know neglecting yourself is one thing, but you shouldn't neglect that sweet southern thing of yours".  
JJ gave her a smile, she wanted to keep the conversation as light as possible "thanks Garcia. Don't worry about that. I will make it up to him."  
Garcia gave her a big smile.  
"Well go home Penelope! You're delaying me" she teased her beautiful friend.  
Her comment hit his mark.  
"Haha, alright you work addict! I'm already gone"  
Just when Garcia turned around JJ said "Oh Garcia one more thing, is everybody gone already?"  
"Uhm well pretty much, but I don't know whether Hotch is still in."  
"Okay thanks, good night."  
"Good night JJ."  
She sighed. Alright almost finished, she said to herself.

Almost an hour went by when JJ was finally writing down the last sentences. She heard footsteps heading towards her door. That had to be Hotch. She realized that he was probably wondering what Rossi was doing in his office so late. Without looking up she heard how the door opened.  
_Surprise_ she wanted to say, but she held herself in. Always be professional around Hotch.  
Before Hotch could comment about what she was still doing here so late, she beat him by saying: "I am almost leaving".  
"Yes you are."  
She couldn't have looked up faster, her heart skipped a beat. The voice wasn't that of Hotch. It was a deep, heavy voice which suited the man standing before her. A tall, impressive build man with big shoulders walked in the office and closed the door.  
For a moment JJ was completed overwhelmed. Her first reaction was a fearful one. Her heart pounded like crazy and her hands became sweaty. Her second reaction was to try and temper the first one. She tried to get the control back over her thoughts and her body and to stay calm.  
"Can I help you sir?" she asked.  
That question made him laugh. But it was a bitter one. "Help" he spat that word out and threw it back to her.  
"Sir.."  
"Do you remember me agent Jareau?" the eyes of the man were filled with anger and rage.  
An emotion that didn't slip the attention of the agent. She reached to the top draw of Rossi's desk, where she had put her gun. But she was too late. Within a second the man had already reached her and forcefully pushed her chair away from the desk. She fell hard on the floor along with the chair. The sound seemed very loud in the empty the building. Before even being able to move or scream two hands grabbed her by her arms and pulled her up.  
"I will make you remember me!"

-

Hotch just got off the phone with Jessica, Haley's sister, to ask how Jack was doing and if he'd gone to bed. He could've guessed all the answers, so it was mostly a call to thank Jessica and let her know that he was headed home in a few minutes. During the call he'd thought he heard some footsteps and was vaguely aware off a male voice, but when he hang up he definitely heard stumbling noises coming from the room next to him.  
_'What the ...? What was Rossi doing in there?'_ alarmed and with a fast pace he walked to the office next to him.  
When he opened the door his heart dropped.  
There, behind the desk, was not standing the older man with the Italian roots he'd expected to see. Instead of that, there stood a tall, strong guy with his arms wrapped around a blond, beautiful woman.  
"JJ" her name left his mouth in a whisper.  
The man was surprised to see another agent walking in and quickly reached for something behind his back and showed a gun. He held it against JJ's head. An unmistakable warning: don't come any closer. He saw the fear in JJ's eyes and it struck him as lighting.  
His hands automatically went to grab his own gun when seconds later he realized that he left it in his office.  
He held both his hand in the air, a gesture to try and calm down the situation.  
"Alright" he said with a calm voice "take it easy. My name is Aaron Hotchner, I'm from the BAU. Sir tell me what you're doing."  
Tears fell from the man his cheek. But it wasn't of sadness. Hotch read in his eyes pure anger and determination. All the alarm bells went off. This man driven by emotion but was also organized. He had a plan and he wasn't about to give that up. On top of that Hotch had seen his face.  
"Do you care for her?" his hands trembled from his rage, but Hotch didn't dare to make a move. JJ looked at him with large, frightened eyes.  
"What?" Hotch minds was racing down possibilities. The man clearly wanted somebody to care for her. Why? To secure that if JJ was hurt it would affect and damage others? To inflict not only pain on JJ but also to as many others. What would happen if he said no? It would throw the man of but would it also sooth his anger a bit?  
"DO YOU CARE FOR HER?" the man shouted.  
JJ closed her eyes as a tear fell from it.  
Hotch mind went blank. He didn't know what to answer. "How do you know agent Jareau?" he asked to stall some time.  
The man grinned. He gained some control over his anger.  
"She meant everything to me. But we don't mean anything to her, do we?"  
"Sir, we can.." Hotch never got to finish his sentence.  
The man shaked his head as he interrupted him "answer the damn question!"  
Hotch took a deep breath. He saw how the man's finger got closer to the trigger.  
"No" his voice sounded very calm and determined when he said it.  
The man blinked a couple of times as did JJ. His pulled his finger a bit away from the trigger.  
"No?" he repeated softly. He sounded confused and a bit disappointed.  
"No" Hotch replied "agent Jareau works for me, but our relationship and my feelings for her never went any further then that of a professional one." He put on his poker face, his brown eyes became even darker so it became impossible to read them.  
He had the man thrown off his game, now he had to make his plan as unattractive as possible and then provide him with a better alternative.  
"Shooting agent Jareau however is a very dumb idea. Believe me it won't take the anger away and you'll be spending the rest of your life behind bars. Is that what you want for your wife?" Hotch quickly glared at the man's wedding ring.  
The man closed his eyes, Hotch could see that his grip loosened a bit. Still it was too dangerous for JJ to make any moves. If she would, the man would definitely react by shooting.  
"Let me help you" Hotch said when the man was still confused about what to do "here's the deal you'll let agent Jareau go, you can even lock her up in this room if you want" Hotch felt safe enough to give him that option since he was pretty sure that JJ had her gun with her in the office "and you and I will step outside. I'll swear that I will let you walk so you can return to your wife."  
The anger had taken place by sadness. The man shook his head, as if he surrendered. Hotch dared to breathe again.  
Then the man looked up and in that moment Hotch realized that he made a terrible mistake of judgement. The man wasn't shaken his head to show that he'd surrendered, the man shook his head to tell him _'you don't understand'.  
_"I'm already behind bars" he lifted up his gun and fired one shot at Hotch.

The heat from that bullet seemed to rush through his whole body even though he was only hit his leg. He pressed his hands on the wound, trying to stop the bleeding. Two figures walked by him. He looked up and saw how the man forced JJ to walk out of the room.  
"Hotch!" JJ's voice was drenched with worry. Not only for herself, he knew, but mostly for him. Then they were gone.  
He became light in his head and started to breathe heavenly. He had to reach the phone. He had to warn his team before this son of a bitch could disappear with JJ.  
He dialled the number from his memory and soon after Rossi picked up his phone. "Rossi, quick someone has taken JJ. They're almost out of the building. Get here now!"  
He hung up and directly starting to call the next number, that of Garcia. Within in seconds she told her the same but he added: "go and check the surveillance images, the man has to be on tape if not make sure a police sketch artist is on stand-by." His last call was to Morgan would inform 911 and the others.  
With all his strength he pulled himself up and dragged himself to the window in the hope that the man had parked his car on the parking lot. Luck wasn't on his side.  
-

The man forcefully had put a tissue to her face. She knew what would come next. She was fighting to stay conscious but with every inhale her head became lighter. She closed her eyes and saw how Hotch was standing in front of them. Just when he seemed to relax a little bit, his face suddenly went more serious than ever before and she could tell that Hotch realized something. Then came the shot. The sound was so sudden that she had closed her eyes and thought that he had shot her. But when she opened it she saw Hotch lying on the ground and blood slowly spreading on the floor. She tried to see where he was hit, but it went to fast. The man dragged her out of the room. No no no! She couldn't leave Hotch when he was injured.  
"Hotch!" she heard how her own voice echoed in her had. Then everything went black.  
Though agent Jareau wasn't struggling anymore the weight of her unconscious body wasn't helping him to make speed. Luckily for him the building was deserted and it didn't take him to long to reach his vehicle.  
The man thought about the words of agent Hotchner. It might not take his anger away, but finally after all those years he felt he was in control again.

Rossi was the first to reach him. He kneeled next him.  
"For crying out loud Hotch!" he said in anger "you didn't tell me you were shot!"  
"I am okay" the SSA replied "JJ.."  
"You're not okay! I'm going to call the ambulance."  
"No! the sketch artist.."  
At that moment Garcia walked in "No I've already got his ID. His name is Andrew Wilkins, he is from Denver. I sent his home address and his license number to Morgan, Blake and Reid and the local police. There already on their way. But I couldn't track the signal of his phone and JJ's phone is still in the building."  
Hotch couldn't remember a time where he was more happy to see his technical analyst.  
In the meantime Rossi was calling for an ambulance.  
"Wait" Hotch said "this man was mission-oriented and didn't care that he was recognized. He probably has another hide-out where he's taken her to."  
"Why JJ?" Rossi asked as he hung up.  
"She was the object of his anger, he said.." Hotch took a second to find the exact words "he said: she meant everything to me. But we don't mean anything to her, do we?"  
"A stalker, a rejected lover?"Rossi asked.  
"I don't think so. He said that _we_ don't mean anything to her. Not I. And he wore a wedding ring."  
Rossi nodded, that didn't sound like a stalker. Rossi thought about the words.  
"She meant everything to me" he slowly repeated the words "meant, pass tense. What if JJ had done a favour for him in the past. Or moreover hadn't done a favour?"  
"Not just a favour.." Hotch thought along "an extremely important favour... something so important that it meant _everything_ to him."  
Suddenly it clicked and both man were looking at each other.  
"An earlier case" Rossi said.  
"That JJ hadn't taken on" Hotch complemented.  
"Garcia" Rossi said "can you find out if there is any connection between JJ and mister Wilkins? Their paths must have crossed somewhere when she was still functioning as an Media Liaison."  
"Look if Wilkins had any children" Hotch said.  
"Right away, sir" the upset analyst left the room in a hurry leaving the two man behind.  
For a moment it was quiet. Hotch focused on shutting the pain out, which had the opposite effect while Rossi was examining the wound.  
"The ambulance should be here in a minute" he said to Hotch.  
"Good" was his only reply.  
They both took a deep breath.  
"They got to find her quickly" Hotch said, though it took him effort to speak the words "whatever his plan is, I fear he's not going to take his time."  
David Rossi nodded.  
"If we are right, and if there was a child involved this man got nothing to lose."

-

Andrew Wilkins thought about his once beautiful little girl. The first time he had held her in his arms was a magical moment. The feelings were so overwhelming, he never knew he could love someone that much. Then and there he promised his little Sarah that he would always protect her. She grew up to be a bubbly, beautiful child that loves to be in the garden, picking flowers. He remembered that sunny day when he came home from a stressful work day with his head full of frustrations and Sarah came running to him with flowers in her hand. All his worries seemed to have vanished by the sight of such innocence. Innocence that was stolen by Paul.  
The love he felt, made place for pure hatred. His hands clamped around the wheel. But it wasn't just him, no it was worse. This all could have been prevented. And that thought was unbearable!  
He had sworn he protect her! But that bitch lying in his trunk had stood in the way.  
And he would make sure that she paid for that!

The paramedics were busy cleaning the wound and where about to transfer Aaron Hotchner to the hospital when the phone rang.  
"It's Garcia" said Rossi, while walking along with the paramedics "yes Garcia, you're on speaker."  
"You were right" she started of "years ago a case was presented to JJ involving the daughter of Andrew Wilkins, Sarah Wilkins. She was 17 years old when her ex-boyfriend Paul Stewart started to stalk and harass her after she had broken up whit him. It worsened but the local police couldn't arrest him."  
"And we couldn't take the case because she hadn't been injured" Rossi interrupted.  
"But after we turned down the case she became injured. She was finally granted a restraining order but three days before Paul had thrown acid in her face." Garcia continued.  
Both men sighed.  
"That must have destroyed him as a farther" Hotch said.  
"And cause a lot of rage against the authorities. Garcia, you said this incident was years ago. What happened that triggered him now?"  
"Well now comes the saddest part.. Sarah has killed herself two weeks ago"  
Hotch shook his head. He had encountered so many horrible cases that the bloody photo's and the crime scenes didn't affect him that much anymore. He was always able to keep a professional distance. But this story of a father and his daughter made him shiver. A quote of Stalin came to his mind _'The death of one man is a tragedy, the death of millions is a statistic.'  
_"Well there you got his trigger" Rossi said. Their worst fear was just confirmed. This man had nothing to lose.  
"He is going to take his anger out on JJ. We need to search for any places where he can take JJ to" said Hotch.  
"Places significant to the relationship with his daughter?" Garcia asked.  
"No he probably wouldn't want to taint those places" Rossis answered "it has to be a place that is close and easy to reach from the BAU and still is deserted. Look for empty houses, stores etc. A place that buys him enough time to execute his plan."  
"Also we have to take JJ's family in protective custody" said Hotch.  
"You really think he would go after his Henry?"  
"If this guy wants an eye for an eye we can't take that risk."  
"Sir we need you to stop moving" a paramedic gave him a strict order "now you need to hang up the phone."  
The ambulance arrived at the hospital.  
Two man and Rossi were walking next to him while he was lying on the stretcher as they rolled him to the emergency room and two doctors met them halfway.  
"Sir, were going to take you into surgery" one of the them said to Aaron.  
"No, no, no JJ is running out of time, please can't you postpone the surgery?"  
"No sir I'm afraid we can't."  
"You don't understand! The life of one of our agents is on the line!" he shouted now.  
"Sir, we need to attend to your wound, now" his voice was calm but also determined.  
Hotch threw all his body weight to the left to roll himself of this damn stretcher but two couples of hands held him back.  
Rossi grabbed his shoulder for a moment "it's okay Hotch were going to do everything we can."  
"Wait Rossi, an eye for an eye. What if .." he took a breath before continuing "what if he's going to use acid on JJ."  
Rossi stopped for a second, his face became pale. Then he seemed to recover his composure.  
"JJ.. Dave.." Hotch mumbled.  
"We will get him Hotch" Rossi promised him, a promise that gruesomely reminded him of the past.  
Hotch closed his eyes, all he saw was JJ. "JJ" he mumbled again. The anaesthesia was about to kick in.  
"No, wait!" he pulled back the arm of the anaesthetist. He couldn't be unconscious not now.  
"Do a local anaesthesia please or... " he took a deep breath "no anaesthesia at all" he said.  
The anaesthetist looked at the surgeon, who gave her a nod.  
"Get the curtain" he said.  
The surgeon looked at the wound. It wasn't as bad as he'd expected. The wound was for more superficial than it appeared at first glance. Actually it almost looked like a grazing shot.  
"How long do you think it will take?" the agent asked him.  
"Well, at first glance it isn't a complicated surgery. You are lucky that your knee wasn't hit. Could you walk after you were shot?" he asked.  
"Only a little" Hotch answered.  
"Alright, well luckily there are no bones or nerves hit. I only have to remove the bullet and stitch you up. With some luck it shouldn't take too long."  
"Good" the serious SSA said.

He took her to a abandoned house after a 15 minute drive. He dragged the blond agent to the back of the house where he had broken a window earlier for them to get in. It was easier said than done. It was dark and he had to be careful not to make any sounds.  
When he got them finally in the house he placed the agent at a seat he brought along earlier and tied her up.  
She could regain consciousness any time, in the meantime he was busy with the acid.  
JJ vaguely heard how her kidnapper was busy with something. She dared to open her eyes, looked at her surroundings and then closed them again.  
She was in a dark, empty room. Probably a living room. She didn't know what he was up to but she had to stall some time. She pretended to be unconscious while she was trying to remember what exactly had happened. The man had known her and got angry when she didn't remember him.  
She lifted her arm, but she couldn't move it. Then she started to move her leg, but again she was unable to move it.  
He'd tied her down to the chair and she couldn't escape.

It was a weird situation which the surgeon had never encountered before. He was stitching up while the SSA was on the phone with a colleague of him.  
"Sir, how are you doing?" the tech asked.  
"Good, tell me what you got" they had no time to lose.  
"Okay, I got 6 possible locations, 3 of them are empty houses."  
"Well Wilkins has probably made preparations. It's a long shot but are there reports of any activity around or in the buildings in the last two weeks?"  
"Give me a moment" it was quiet for a moment "yes, two reports! one of them concerns a house that's for sale. Two days ago a concerned neighbour heard something so they checked and someone had broken a window. She feared that boys from the neighbourhood had done that. The other report is from yesterday about an empty factory. The previous owner had checked on it when he heard someone running and fleeing. It says here that he thought it was a homeless guy or a drug addict."  
"Alright send Morgan, Reid and Blake to the closest address."  
"That would be the factory" Garcia answered.  
"Okay sent Rossi and available units to the house and the other 4 locations. What's the address?"  
Garcia gave him the address of the house.  
"That's nearby the hospital!"  
"Yes sir it is... Sir?"  
Hotch had already hung up when he threw both of his legs around one side of the table.  
"Sir, what are you doing!" the surgeon had only just finished.  
"Give me a cane!"  
"You can't already walk, you just..." the surgeon protested.  
"Listen!" Hotch said while he fiercefully looked in the surgeon eyes "the life of my agent is in danger! I will never forgive myself if anything happens to her. Now let me go!"

She needed to wake up!  
He got agitated and walked up and down the room.  
Why did it take so long? She had to be conscious for him to execute his plan. She had to hear and see what she had done. She had to feel the pain he felt.  
JJ kept her eyes shut. She could feel his tension built up. Who was he? Her mind was running like crazy. She suddenly felt how to hands grabbed her fierce fully and shook her.  
"Wake up!" he yelled, spit came in her face.  
She had to control her body, stay relaxed, buy some time. Wait till Hotch would come. Oh God.. Hotch.. It came back to her again. She heard the shot. She had to fight to relax her muscles. Then he hit her hard in the face. She flinched while she felt warm blood running down her chin. In a reflex she opened her eyes.  
"Good you're awake" he said trembling from anger "I wouldn't want you to miss this."  
"Why are you doing this?" she could hear her own desperation.  
He didn't answer, instead he seemed to grab some sort of bucket from what had to be the kitchen.  
"What are you doing?" she became scared what would be inside that bucket.  
Again he didn't respond to her. He dragged the bucket and put it right in front of her. Then he looked her in her eyes with a crazy glitter in his eyes.  
It was then and there that she thought of him as wild. And that made her quiet.  
She followed his gaze to the bucket and it all hit her.  
"Acid" she whispered.  
He grinned at her.  
"You thought I was going to kill you didn't you? Well you didn't think I would let you get off the hook that easy did you? You don't deserve death, you deserve hell."  
He made a move toward the bucket.  
"Sarah" she whispered.  
He froze.  
"Sarah Wilkins" she repeated. She sighed full of emotion, "you thought I forgot about Sarah?"  
It was as if she was talking to a statue. As if she'd said some sort of spell and robbed the man off his ability to move.  
"I'd never forgot about her" she shook her head while saying it, every word was meant. "You have no idea.. you have no idea. I thought about her every case we handled. You have no idea how guilty and powerless I felt!"  
Mister Wilkins looked up "powerless?"  
He came very close to her.  
"You had ALL THE POWER!" tears fell from his eyes "YOU COULD HAVE PREVENTED ALL OF THIS. YOU KILLED HER!"  
It was as if he had slapped her in the face again.  
"She ... she's.." JJ thought she could faint any moment "she died?"  
"She died the moment that monster threw acid in her face" the father broke "you know how people would call her? Monster! Freak! she couldn't walk the street without being called names or laughed at. She didn't dare to leave house any more. She just lay in bed all day. Just crying. She used to be so beautiful.. so happy.."  
The father fell to his knees. "And I kept telling her, that no matter what she would always stay beautiful to me. But it was like I couldn't reach her anymore. She said that no one would ever fall in love with a monster, that she would never have children. She would never have a career. You know I was the one to find her.. in her bed... and this vomit next to her.. I couldn't protect her.."  
JJ let her tears go. She was overwhelmed by grief and sadness. The feeling was so overwhelming that she wasn't even scared anymore.  
Mister Wilkins buried his face in his hands and just sat there, a broken father.  
"I am so sorry, I am so very sorry mister Wilkins" she said.  
The father took a breath and removed his hands from his face.  
"I don't need your sympathy" he said "what I need is for you to pay!"  
His hand reached toward the bucket when suddenly a harsh sound of someone breaking a door filled the room.  
Mister Wilkins turned around but as he did that he felt something hard hit the back of his head. He became instantly dizzy as he felt a second strike at his shoulder and a third hit his back. He fell to the ground dizzy and disoriented.  
Hotch was breathing heavily, his head was so light headed that he felt like he could faint anytime. He had put all his energy and strength in the final sprint. He took a few steps back and almost tripped, still holding the cane in his hand.  
Then her beautiful blue eyes met his. She looked scared, worried, sad and confused all at one.  
"Hotch" she said without a sound.  
Despite everything, despite the situation they were in, despite his own serious character, his face broke into a smile.  
_click_  
Mister Wilkins pointed a gun at his face.  
"I didn't mean to hurt you mister Wilkins" Hotch begun, suddenly feeling very calm now he found JJ "but I can't let you throw acid in her face".  
Wilkins shivered a bit while he kept the gun pointed at him.  
"I know what happened to Sarah" Hotch continued "I know what that monster did to her. But what you are doing now is exactly the same thing. Don't become the monster that destroyed your daughter. You can't take away the hurt by hurting agent Jareau. And more importantly you can't get Sarah back by doing so."  
Mister Wilkins looked at him and lowered his weapon. "I failed"  
"No you haven't" Hotch slowly felt how his head became light again.  
"Yes I did.. I failed her.. I failed myself.." there was only pain, "I can't live like this, I can't live without her.."  
The father started to point the gun at himself.  
"Mister Wilkins, please.. I know death seems like the only way out of the pain, but you've still got a wife. Sarah's mother... Is she not worth fighting for?"  
The man closed his eyes and softly started mumbling. He was in his own world. A world of pain.  
"Please mister Wilkins, give me the gun" Hotch pleaded.  
Wilkins still wasn't moving, his eyes closed, tears dripping off his chin.  
"One day you'll be with Sarah again, one day she'll be in your arms again. But not today, think about her mother... think about your wife. You can still take care of Sarah's mother. Give me gun."  
Mister Wilkins opened his eyes. The hatred was gone, the only thing standing before Hotch was a broken man.  
Very slowly he lowered his gun. Numbed. Hotch stretched out his hand, gently taking over the gun.  
At the same time Rossi and police man rushed in the house through various entrances. From all corners people were shouting at the man. "Down on your knees, hands behind your back!"  
Rossi came in the back door. His gun pointed at Wilkins. Then with an ease, that gave away years of experience, he grabbed both arms of the man and handcuffed him.  
Hotch took a few steps towards JJ, than almost felt down on his knees as he started to free her from the chair.  
JJ was heavily breathing and in her rush to get away from the chair, she fell down on her knees next to Hotch. Now that all the adrenaline was gone, her body felt so heavy as if her bones were made of stone. She wanted to say something to Hotch, anything, but as soon as she opened her mouth she choked in her emotions.  
"Shh, it's okay, I'm here" his placed his hands gently on her shoulder en pulled her towards him. She lay her head on his chest and could hear his heart beat, steady and strong and it calmed her down. He wrapped his arms around her and starting to stroke her back, and then her hair.  
Somewhere in the background he vaguely noticed how the cops escorted mister Wilkins out of the house. It was quiet, no sirens, no voices.  
He wanted this moment never to end. There on the cold ground... with JJ safe in his arms.

She sat in one of the parked cars of the BAU, with the door open.  
Mister Wilkins was forcefully put in another car. With the sirens on the car left.  
"Hotch are you okay? Shall I drive you back to the hospital?" Rossi looked at him with a deep frown.  
"I'm okay, I would like to drive JJ back if that's alright?"  
"Drive? But your leg, you can't drive.." Rossi said.  
Hotch stretched out his arm, with his hand open.  
It was a wordless moment in which Rossi eventually placed the car keys in his hand.

The drive back was a quiet one. Both of them consumed in their own thoughts. Hypnotized.  
A bump in the road brought Hotch back to earth. He looked next to him. JJ was staring straight ahead of her, her eyes filled with tears that wouldn't leave them.  
"JJ" he whispered and grabbed her hand that was all cold.  
"Hotch.. I.. I.." she swallowed a couple of times fighting to say the words, blinking with her eyes.  
"What is it?"  
"I deserved this.."  
"What? No JJ.." he hadn't expected this.  
"Yes Hotch, I do" JJ shook her head "that girl is dead.. Sarah she is dead. And Wilkins was right.. If I had taken the case then we might have prevented all of this. Of her going through hell and never coming out of it."  
She buried her face in her hands.  
Hotch let go of the gas and drove the car to the side of the road where he parked it. He stepped out of the car and opened JJ's door.  
"Come with me" he offered her his hand and helped her out of the car.  
The night was filled with stars and quiet as everyone was peacefully sleeping. Hotch got out of his coat and placed it on JJ's shoulder, shielding her from the cold.  
"Walk with me."  
And they did. They breathed in the cold air, that had an refreshing effect on their brains.  
The path they walked was just outside of the town. Hotch helped her with a small ascending path. Then they came to an open spot, with a view over the sleeping city with their little lights.  
"I use to come here when I was younger when I needed to clear my head."

JJ smiled. "It's beautiful."  
"There is a bench over there" he gently guided her towards it.  
They sat down. Looking at all the lights in front of them and above them.  
"Do you remember when you asked me in the plane why I choose the BAU?" Hotch was referring to moment many years ago.  
"Yes" she replied.  
"You know when you start to get older you start to be aware of the evil in the world. And the amount of evil can sometimes be so overwhelming that if you start working on 1 thing you feel like you fall short on all the other things. Choosing to work with the BAU meant for me not working in all the other departments. It made me feel in control and at the same time powerless. But I had to make a choice. We all have to. And you had to make more choices than all of the other members from the BAU.. And that is a job that's unbelievably hard.."  
JJ sniffed.  
It was silent for a moment. A moment in which JJ reached out to Hotch's hand.  
"You know.." Hotch softly proceeded "Garcia told me the time and date that the case of Sarah was presented to you. Many years ago.."  
JJ didn't know where he was going with this.  
"The date Garcia told me is a date that I remember very well and I probably never forgot" he said softly.  
"Why?" her voice sounded fragile.  
"Because at that time you had given me a case in which 2 children were abducted, Melissa and Davey. And we found them in time, you remember? In time, before they were assaulted, before they were harmed. And when we found them we not only brought them back to their worried parents, but we also freed another 6 children."  
He paused for a moment.  
"We saved 8 children that day JJ. And if it wasn't for you, if it wasn't for your choices we might have never been able to find those children."  
He looked at her. At her blonde hair, at her blue eyes, at her broken smile. And before he realized what he was doing his hand placed his hand gently on her chin and turned her head towards him. He stroke her cheek softly.  
"JJ, don't you ever think that the evil in this world is your fault" he whispered "don't fight evil with doubt and guilt. You are not alone in this."  
JJ looked at him. Hotch could see how her eyes changed. The look of desperation and guilt took place of another look. One of acceptance, determination and something else.. the moment Hotch realized what is was, was the moment that it took his breath away.. plain and simple love. 


End file.
